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The Birds and the Bees

Summary: Eelim lands Ikin a double-date and attempts to teach him how to talk to girls.

Cast: Cygnari, Wendari, Ikin, Mek, Eelim, Rukais, Kallyn

Air Date: Tuesday 26 July - 2653 AD

Setting: Brig <MCV Alopex>

Approximately four hundred by a hundred feet with cracking violet atmosphere fields on each end, the light gray plascrete and ceramet launch bay is taped off into sections with bright purple tape. Three fighter spots are placed in each of the four corners, allowing them quick access to the fight while allowing other ships in and out. There are spaces just behind these for Scabra-class collectors, Gazriki-class shuttles, and four spots near the center for small visiting ships. At the very center of the launch bay, a rectangular tower with a three hundred sixty degree wraparound plasteel window directs traffic within the bay. A small airlock-style door to the starboard fore leads to the ready room, and another to the starboard aft leads to a workshop, while a pressurized lift entrance sits to the center aft.

Contents: Exits:

Cygnari stands by the ramp of his freighter, looking over a cargo manifest and every so often glancing around the bay. Idly he flares a wing and fluffs the feathers with his beak while he waits. <re for all the new arrivals>

Eelim enters the launch bay via shuttle, exitting it with a little hop. He looks around as he slides an arm around Kallyn, the shirtless Aukami peering about. "Bird...Bird..." He looks at Cygnari. "Eh." He keeps

Mek arrives from Aft Lift <MCV Alopex>. Mek has arrived.

Cygnari looks to Eelim and chuffs a bit... seems this one does. His eyes return to the cargo manifest he's holding once again, a talon starting to tap on the deck impatiently.

Wendari isn't doing anything particularly interesting, aside from hopping on her talons to the tune of some really, really bad ska music as she sweeps along the walls. There's a feather duster clamped in her blue beak, probably made from her own feathers.

Mek pads in, sticking mainly to the shadows and the outside edge of the platform. He wasn't specificly trying to stay hidden, but still kept in the relative darkness.

"Right, well, later." Rukais passes sideways to Mek as he follows slightly behind. He heads towards the ready room, giving the Pyracani a beguiled glance backwards.

"Really? Huh, I should probably stop considering I never say anything offensive." A win towards Kallyn and he spots the jamming Wendari. "Bingooo." He speaks smoothly, retrieving his arm from around Kallyn. "You okay, bay? You look kind of out of it. Grab some rest, i'll meet up with you soon." He gives her a kiss, and then moves for the janitor Falari.

Wendari sashays across the floor, and whistles towards Eelim as he nears. "Hey hot stuff, need something?" She pauses, then hops back a bit, pointing her broom at the Aukami, "No wait! I didn't poison yer damn kid! Agh, no psi-tricks!"

"Been out of it aaaall day," Kallyn nods, rubbing at her face, "All right, I'll see you later, love." She returns that kiss before heading off for a nap. She laughs at Wendari on the way.

Ikin climbs out of one of the shuttles after a bit. Spotting Eelim still in the vicinity, the bird attempts to sneak off towards the lift. Yeaaaaaaah, right. The eight foot tall feather duster is going to "Sneak", uh-huh. Thaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat'll work well. Needless to say, he may as well be playing "Ride of the Valkyries" from speakers attached to his wings and walking with a neon sign attached to his head that reads, "IKIN R HERE".

The pilot in the black and purple jumpsuit disappears into the ready room for a moment or two. Maybe he's naked in there.

Mek leans against the railing, just looking around at everybody and the goings on in general

"Later, bay." The Aukami thug says to Kallyn, watching her leave a moment. "Whoa whoa," Eelim says as he nears Wendari, "Relax, it's all good. Just wanted to say what up." He glances behind him, spotting the other Falari coming out of the shuttle, "Ayo Ikin! Come here, homey." Eelim waves irraticaly at the engineer. Then back to Wendari, he leans in close and whispers something.

Kallyn has left RP mode. Kallyn has left. Cygnari has left RP mode. Cygnari has left.

Wendari doesn't miss the stealthy Ikin even in her distraction. Kallyn's laugh scares her more than it ought to. She settles down, sparing a quick glance to Mek before turning her head to one side, eying Eelim. "Hrnn. A'ight... Nothing's up, really, just cleaning up after you slobs." At the whisper, Wendari gawks, feathers poofing out. "Cripes! I... Wha'..." Her voice drops to a whisper.

Ikin may have reached critical awkward, captain! Fortunately, he's almost out of the room! But wait! One of the bird's superiors steps out of the elevator and orders the bird to check the Ready Room airlock's hydraulics. It's shutting with enough force to cut someone's hand off. Ikin, at that moment, looks like he's seriously debating sticking his HEAD in to verify that statement, but dutifully drudges off to go fix the door.

James Rukais returns from the ready room, no less dressed than when he entered. He moves towards the far end of the launch bay, where the fighters are stored.

Mek lazily flicks open a small simple pda, checking his messages and some other relavent info.

Eelim snickers a bit, charming grin rising on his features as he whispers something back to Wendari, while his eyes move towards Ikin, near the lift.

Wendari warbles absently, turning her head nearly upside-down as Ikin wanders away. She straightens upon spotting the Lunite. "Say, isn't he that streaker that was brigged..." Wendari clicks her tongue unhappily, "I can't believe I missed that." Eelim continues to whisper to her like a shady bastard, and she wags her duster at him, "Speak up, son! I know yer pretty but ya' don't have to hide yerself from you fans here. Ehhh? He does?" Now she fixes her gaze upon the birdy engineer.

Ikin moves pretty fast when he's humiliated. He's already at the door with a wrench in hand, adjusting the pressure levels in the door with it in a way that only an engineer could truly understand, provided that engineers were the only non-idiots present. To non-idiots, he's just tightening a nut.

Mek closes the PDA with a sigh, looking back up to see how much had changed since he wasn't looking

Ikin fiddles irately with the door's pressure, using a small hand-held gauge to attempt to get it back into green, rather than red where it currently sticks. In a bout of frustration, the bird actually smacks the pipe he's working on with the wrench, which causes the gauge to go down to green. Oddly, it stays that way.

Eelim is a shady bastard. But he speaks up, "Yeah yeah, fsho. Pretty?" Eelim looks around, "Nah, these people hate me," He waves a hand a dismissively, "Yeah, do you down or what? Prolly be a fun time, lil' boozin... chillin, you know." He reachs into his pocket ands over a holo note with his number on it.

Wendari rubs her beak, deep in thought. "Eh. Ehhh, Aukami-man, if he were any sort of raptor he'd come over here and say somethin' about it." She spreads her wings and thumps them a few times. "Oi, Mr. Fixit, just give it some love!" Either the highly toxic fumes of the chemicals she works with are getting to her, or she's just very blunt. A sharp whistle follows. She takes the note and pockets it right away. "Oh fine, I'll tag along. I dunno' why he ain't after that physicist brain rocket quantum surgeon bird."

Mek idly pulls out his combat knife and starts twirling it between his fingers; just trying to entertain himself. So much for the promise of a dirtside op...

Ikin's feathers puff out a fair bit as he overhears the conversation as he begins testing the door. It manages to shut in a hiss of air, without too terribly much bone-crunching action. Wendari's call surprises him a bit and causes him to drop the wrench with a loud *CLANG*.

"Ight cool, sounds good." Eelim says with a grin and upwards raise of his chin. "I'll be seein' you soon then." The shirtless Aukami moves towards Ikin then, confident swagger evident in his gait. "Ayo nerdbird." He says as he nears. A pat on his wing, "Got us a double date, homey. Getcha player pants on, ill let ya know when its goin' down."

Mek looks up at the loud clang and his knife instincivly goes to a reverse fighting grip. But spotting the source of the noise, he relaxes again; and goes back to twirling

If somebody had just told Ikin his whole family had been killed by a space-station toilet falling from the sky, he wouldn't have looked any more simultaneously horrified and incredulous. "Uh... I... you... what... I..." the bird once again starts attempting to say something, but all that comes out is some stuttering one-syllable words. Congrats, Eelim, you broke 'im!

"Ay, ay, relax kid. Imma teach you everything there is to know." He holds his arms out. "First off. Stop stutterin'." He looks around. "Were gonna need someone to practice on." A look around the area and he spots Mek. "Ay!" He calls over, "Mind helpin' us out a sec?" He waves him over.

Mek looks up from his knife sheathing it smoothly, and raises an eyebrow. "with what exactly?" he asks

Rukais spares a glance across the busy floor at the little display, he smirks lightly.

Ikin picks his wrench back up on automatic and places it back in his vest, before glancing over at Eelim, still quite unable to bring himself to say anything. Poor, poor birdy.

"Gotta help my boy here get over the girl jitters, get him laid." Eelim responds to Mek, waving over Rukais too. "Come on now, team effort." A look to Ikin. "Okay, lets start with the basics." He clears his throat, leaning against Ikin's wing. "When your talkin' to the bitch, I mean girl, shit this could be your future girl. My bad. When your talkin' her, keep eye contact. It shows confidence. Speak clearly, and slowly." He waits for an assistant in his training.

Mek rolls his eyes, but pads over anyways; not exactly how he was going to be able to help... being slightly anti-social by nature

Rukais walks on over, pulling a wire out from one of the consoles and running it several meters across to a different console. He drops it to one side and leaves it for the moment, content to involve himself in making Ikin a real... er... man.

"Uh..." Ikin looks down at the ground, but he makes a sort of half-hearted attempt to actually make eye-contact. Uh, yeah. That doesn't go too well. Ikin's eyes seem to be quite opposed to actually resting on somebody else's for more than eight seconds.

"Try this," Eelim says, "Just watch. Eye contact, smooth clear talking. Confidence." A motion towards Mek, "He'll be the girl i'm tryin' to get with. Scope it." Eelim steps towards Mek, "What up girl, I was just lookin around the room and you happened to catch my attention. Whaddya say you and I grab a drink and talk about how you been peeking at me all night." A grin back at Ikin, "If you can make her laugh, its a plus." He motions towards Rukais, "That's your girl. Approach, eye contact, talk smoothly. Don't stutter."

Mek keeps the eye contact for the duration of his roll, grinning slightly at his method; then flicks his gaze over to Ikin and Rukias. "and simply stay calm, and confident."

"I thought heavy eye contact was a threatening gesture, for Falari." Rukais offers as he slows in his approach, raising a brow. And then he's a bird. Hands raise to his shoulders and he pokes his head forward in what most would recognise as a chicken (a particularly effeminate chicken). He caws gently, giving Ikin a soft 'come at me' expression with his pursed, beak-lips.

Whelp, Ikin finds his voice, if only to drape his hand across his beak and say, "Pardon me, I'm just trying to decide precisely how offended I should be here... I'm caught between "Very" and "Extremely" at the moment."

"He's fuckin around man, focus!" Eelim says with a bit of a laugh. He sets an arm around the Falari, "I'll save ya." A look to Rukais, "I'm just trying to decide precisely how offended I should be here...Cuz you been eye fuckin' me all night and haven't even bought me dinner yet." A look to Ikin as he releases him. "Good job not stuttering atleast. Try again on this dude." He indicates Mek.

Mek stands waiting, shoulders back and set, stance balenced and tall; waiting for Ikin to try a line.

"Would you rather hit on me being me?" Rukais asks simply, straightening up and giving the Falari a frown. And then the frown turns to Eelim. "Honey, you couldn't afford this."

"Oh, uh... Hi. How's your leg?" Ikin asks Mek, tilting his head to one side. He does slightly better with the eye contact and he manages speak clearly, but he doesn't seem too willing to use one of Eelim's uh... "Lines". I wonder why?

"...Cuz its gonna be wrapped around me by the end of the night." Eelim finishes for Ikin. "See? Not too hard. Your gettin better." A chuckle towards Rukias, "This ones got attitude. Get her, Ikin."

Rukais crosses his arms, remaining passive.

Mek puts a hand in his pocket, leaning on a nearby wall, still interested in the proceedings; they are quite interesting to watch

"Erm... I uh... I don't think I'm going to say that." Ikin replies scratching his head, "There's confidence and then there's suicidal tendencies... I'm not quite suicidal enough for that." he doesn't stammer after the first few words, at least!

"Right. Walk that line and you'll have so many feathers on your dick you'll be thankin' me for the rest of your life...Atleast you got the eye contact and stammer down. Were lookin' good."

"It's a well known fact in life that you can only ever succeed when the odds of doing so are a million to one." Rukais concurs with Mek, "Arguably, you're not doing /enough/ suicidal gestures, but this is just a test run."

"Uh... Whatever, there." Ikin says, not trying to explain the lack of logic. Apparently aware of his nervous tics, because his arms kind of jump to attempt to scratch, but he stops himself halfway through. "Hopefully I can get through this without her melting my face."

"Yeah, yeah, take a risk, homey." Eelim agrees, "These guys know. If shes not diggin it, theres a whole lotta ho's to goes, ya knows?" Eelim lets out an exhale. "This was constructive. We're going to dinner wit that janitor chick, Ikin. Go get a decent outfit, not too flashy, keep it casual. Some bird cologne would be a good idea too. Whatever smells good to you guys. And when we go, I swear to god if you bring your PDA i'll smash the fuck outta it. Were gettin' you laid, homey. Its gonna happen." The Aukami thug pretends to get emotional as he sets his hand on Ikin's wing. "They grow up so fast..." A grin, "Don't worry, i'll be there to help you out."

"One thing i've learned in my life is that slow is smooth, smooth is fast. Keep that in mind and stay cool out there." Mek says with a grin, "and don't worry, no matter what happens time can heal all wounds."

"And when you're overloaded with advice, remember: The stuff best remembered is usually contradictory." Rukais looks between Ikin and Eelim for a moment before he turns and heads back to the console, muttering something that sounds conspicuously like "I want my pipe." but could easily have been, "These melons are ripe." or "I feel like chicken tonight."

"I'm not sure if that's reassuring or horrifying there, Eelim..." Ikin says, scratching the back of his head. So he DOES have a sarcasm bone in his body, somewhere, "I'll leave my PDA behind... Not sure if my dress clothes would be good enough, though. They're kind of... Thrift store."

"Like I said, not too flashy. Just look good, we'll be alright." He fistbumps Ikin's wing. "Ight, im out." A look to Mek and Rukais, "Thanks for the help, fellas, Names Eelim, by the way." Directed to Mek. Then he skips away in mock joy, sing songing, "Going on a datttte!"

Mek nods to eelim as he leaves, then to Ikin. "You'll be fine." he says, before taking a step back and fading into the shadows of the platform again.

Rukais merely goes back to work with the ground team, making sure the fighters are prepped for worst case scenarios (or drills... so many drills...).

Ikin heads back into one of the shuttles, muttering something about needing a stiff drink.